"Hey, What’s Going On?!" – Why Some Dogs Struggle When Their Humans Hug Each Other

It’s a sweet moment — a hug between partners, kids, or family members. But just as you go in for that warm embrace, your dog rushes in, barking, whining, or trying to squeeze in the middle like a furry referee.

Sound familiar?

If your pup seems anxious, confused, or even upset when members of your household hug each other, you’re not alone. And no, your dog isn’t being dramatic or jealous. There’s actually a lot going on beneath the surface — emotionally and behaviorally.

Let’s take a closer look at what might be happening and how to help your pup feel more at ease.

🐶 “Why Are My People Squishing Each Other?!”

From a dog’s perspective, human hugs can look a little... intense.

Dogs are experts at reading body language — it’s their first language, after all. But what looks like affection to us can be confusing or even concerning to them. Two people standing close, wrapping arms around each other, maybe laughing, maybe crying — your dog doesn’t have the context to know if this is playful or a conflict.

They might see:

• Tension or restraint

• Unusual vocal tones (excited, emotional, or loud)

• A shift in the family “energy”

To your pup, it might not look like a loving moment — it might look like something they need to interrupt or fix.

🚨 Common Reactions from Dogs During Human Hugs

Here are some ways dogs often respond:

• Getting between people or physically wedging into the hug

• Barking or whining to break up the interaction

• Jumping up or pawing at you

• Lip licking, yawning, or pacing (subtle signs of anxiety)

• Growling or snapping (a rare but serious stress response)

They’re not being “naughty.” They’re trying to manage a situation they don’t understand — and possibly one that makes them feel unsafe or unsure.

🧠 What’s Really Going On?

This kind of behavior is usually rooted in one or more of the following:

• Confusion: The dog doesn’t understand the body language or tone and assumes something is wrong.

• Resource guarding: Some dogs feel protective of one person and may not want others to get close.

• Anxiety or overstimulation: Especially if hugs are accompanied by laughter, squealing, or big movements.

• Lack of socialization to human affection rituals: If a dog wasn’t exposed to these behaviors early on, they may react as if it’s a novel and potentially threatening situation.

💛 How to Help Your Dog Feel Better About Hugs

The goal isn’t to stop hugging — it’s to help your dog feel more comfortable with it. Here’s how:

1. Desensitize and Countercondition

• Start small: brief, calm hugs at a distance from your dog. Graduate to hands on shoulders before a full embrace, think grade school dancing

• Pair hugs with something your dog loves (treats, a chew, gentle praise).

• Gradually reduce distance as they relax, always watching body language.

2. Teach an Incompatible Behavior

Train a positive behavior like:

• “Place” or “go to your bed” when you hug.

• A calm sit-stay for a reward.This gives your dog something to do instead of intervening.

3. Reward Calm Observation

When your dog sees a hug and doesn’t react, reinforce it! Calm glances without intervention get praise or a treat.

4. Avoid Punishment

Correcting or scolding your dog for reacting will only increase their stress and confusion. Stay positive and build their trust instead.

👋 When to Call in Help

If your dog shows signs of serious stress, resource guarding, or aggression when people show affection, don’t go it alone. Reach out to a certified positive reinforcement professional.

Final Woof

Your dog loves you. All of you. And they’re trying their best to navigate this strange human world where people randomly mash their bodies together and call it love. With a little patience, training, and empathy, we can help them feel secure — even during the warmest family moments. 🐾💛